Lesbian sex and roadworks. Guess which I prefer?

No joke or anything appealed tonight. So you get a picture of a thingy with giant thingies. Aren't they giant? I bet he regrets marrying a nun-thingy....

It feels good to be typing again. I'm sorry for being neglectful for a couple of days, I've been away. But hey, lets not dwell on the negative!

I took lesbian friend, LB, and her mother to the airport today for their holidays. I didn't think "mother" knew her daughter was lesbian - how wrong was I?!

Within a few minutes of leaving this conversation began:

Mother: "So, how is sex without penetration?"
LB: [without hesitation] "It's better than you'd think. I sometimes get penetration but generally g/f and I just do loving, tongues and fingers...."
Mother: [equal lack of hesitation]"But you sometimes get proper penetration? How does that work? Strap-ons?"
LB: "We don't use those. If I strapped on a dick I'd be kinda saying 'I want to be a man' wouldn't I? And if I took one from my g/f I'd be saying 'I want a man to fuck me', so we don't generally use them..."
Mother: "Generally? But you do use them? I can't imagine how you can have sex without something proper in your vag...."
LB: "Don't be silly, I have something proper in my vag mum! Just not a strap-on. And I sometimes do use or receive a strap-on, but only when I'm having sex, not with my lover...."
Mother: "You mean you do stuff with more than just your lover?"
LB: "Well, yeah, but only sex. And she's always there too. It's different when it's just us girls..."
Mother: "Are you going to do this sort of stuff while we're on holiday?"
LB: "Naaah, I've got to share a room with you haven't I?"
Mother: "I may see if they've got another room so you can get on with your thing. And I may ask you for advice...."

I'm very open minded and I've met lots of people but that was the first time I'd heard that particular situation unfurl.

The closest to it before today was when there was this bar-wench and her duaghter...oh, hang on, you don't want to know about that...

It took us over 5 hours to get to Gatwick, the M25 is being repaved or some such shit. If I ran the country, or department of transport, that's what I'd do too - Yeah, honestly!

I'm not being double sarcastic at all! I'd fucking CLOSE a quarter of the countries busiest motorway for 3 years to "improve" it. I'd make sure there are cones everywhere but no workmen to be seen. I'm not impressed about that stretch of road.

But journey back was much better. I set a personal record, one which I never want to beat.

I know it's not big or clever, but I done the journey back in under 2.5 hours. Luckily my average speed works out legal! I only done 66mph all the way home on average I promise! (for anyone used to driving m25 and a12, that's not bad is it eh?!)

Upon arriving back, had this little conversation:
LB: "Are you nearly home yet?"
Me: [actually home, but daren't admit it!] "Yeah, about an hour from home now, it's going ok"
LB: "An hour from home?! You must have been flying! It took us 5 hours on the way here!"
Me: "Well, now It's just me in the car, 've no longer got a precious cargo on board so I can speed a bit...."
LB: "Oh! That's a lovely thing to say! You're so sweet...."
Me: "Well, I know you'd kill me if anyting had happened to you make-up bag...."
LB: "You bastard! i thought you cared about me then!"

tee hee.

I got a call from the arsehead, Mr Mann, at borough council. He insists everything is now sorted, so I'll let you know more about that tomorrow.

I'm in weird mood again, life's a giggle eh?!