First aussie road rage incident

Yesterday I left work a bit early. I drove along the three lane hi-way to my suburb. As we got close I needed to move to the left lane. Traffic was minimal so I mirror, signal and......nope. No manouvre. Cos there's a prick that's coming up beside me. I slow. He slows. I speed up. He speeds up.

Incase he thinks I've just left my signal on (yeah, right!) I cancel it. I drop back and signal again. He slows. He's driving a shitty little yaka-hama-zuki piece of shit and he has three friends shoe-horned onboard to point and laugh at my efforts to change lane.

I give him one more chance. I accelerate well ahead and signal lane change. He zooms up the inside. I check he's got space to move to and I change lane. He goes apeshit. I guess it's not nice being in a car with about as much bravado as the French army and having 2 tons of ute bearing down on ya. Fuck him. He started it.

I then moved to the far left lane without drama and 1km or so down the road I signalled to make my turn. They took this chance to roar up my arse and then swerve at the last minute while all four were giving me the bird. I was actually quite impressed. But also a little annoyed as I hadn't done a thing wrong.

Instead of turning left I chucked a u-ey around the central road marker and got straight on their tail. At the next intersection the lights were red. I pulled up close behind them. Real close. Like 1cm close. I didn't want them to panic and try a rear ram. I figured I had about 11 seconds before the lights changed.

I rummaged for cigarettes for about 5 seconds. I slowly took one out, lit it and only then put the ute in neutral. I opened the door and watched as the guys two passengers in the rear completely shit themselves. As I put a foot on the road the lights changes and they were GONE.

It was perfect. I didn't want to have any interaction with the guys, I just wanted them to shit themselves. I think I achieved that.