Some people just make work FUN!

Today I went into the office. I've been working from home recently but occasionally these sacrifices have to be made. I used to commute to the office which involved a very early start. Today I'd arranged a lift in with my manager. I didn't wake until 7am which is around the time we'd arranged to meet.

Well done me, eh?

So I logged onto the work system from home and went back to bed for a couple of hours. If I'm virtually present I'm reality paid and that's all that really matters. It makes up for all the hours I spend thinking about work related stuff while not during logged working time.

I blagged a lift of a neighbour a little later. I was amazingly productive. I made a new report and my direct manager guy told me an hour later that "everyone is pawing themselves under the desk 'bout that report mate!". I loved that expression! Let's call him "FG" (Funny Guy) for the rest of this post.

Later, a boss of the company came into my office (which annoyingly contains a shared printer) to collect something. He's a very senior boss. And he's bald. And he has no sense of humour. Let's call him BB (for bald-boss)

BB approached me and asked whether the printout on the printer was mine. I said it was. He asked if I could make the report title BLACK because it would be cheaper than BLUE. I just had to nod in stunned silence because I couldn't think of a suitable reply.

I mentioned this to FG when I next saw him and this happened:

FG: "Hey! BB! You want this heading in black?"

BB: "Well, it would save ink in the printers"

FG: "They're fucking laser printers you prick! There's no ink!"

BB: "It's still wasting colour"

FG: "Is this why you've got no hair? You just trying to save money on shampoo?"

BB: "That's not..."

FG: "The fucking company logo is BLUE, are you on a campaign to change that as well?!"

BB: [walks out]

me: [tries to get up from the floor from laughing]

You gotta love these Aussies!

Later FG waited until BB left his office and then chucked his proper office swivel chair out. Literally. He just threw it off the balcony into the skip. He then replaced it with one of those horrible moulded plastic chairs. Later:

BB: "Anyone know where my chair has gone?"

FG: "Aw yeah. I sold it mate"

BB: "You WHAT?!"

FG: "Mate, it's pretty obvious our company is getting low on dough if we have to watch out for colour printing so I sold it on ebay and chucked the proceeds in the company kitty"

BB: [Leaves fuming]

It's worth mentioning at this point, I work for one of the largest companies in Australia. If this was some family run outfit it wouldn't be funny but the way it is I'm in constant worry of pissing me daks when my manager is anywhere about. He just makes my working days happy!