You're nicked sunshine...

TT is reading this now. Bah! Bollocks! I've been well and truly rumbled - I think. It's not actually fact yet, but I expect to see an entry in Statcounter tomorrow that will correspond with her lunch break. Hello my love, sorry for keeping this secret, but in my defense, you keep one too, and you're more than welcome to read through the back posts and confirm that I do nothing but love you.

Anyhoo, back to normal stuff, I guess that's the best way to deal with your lover discovering a "secret" blog? In my last post I promised to tell you two other things. I can only remember one. Vagina Cigarettes:

TT and I went to a pub together on friday night - just after the puppy incident. I smoke cigs and a couple of drunk girls on the table next to us kept borrowing my lighter. I got a little fed up with it once it turned into a "once-every-two-minutes" occurence. "You're not very good at smoking are you?" I suggested, after she came back to light the same cig for a third time. TT kicked me in the leg under the table and gave me a "Behave yourself, they're Australian and you're NOT" glance over the table.

The girls both went to the loo together (as girls do of course) and asked us to watch their stuff. The moment they were out of site TT said "You realise they like you don't you? You've got a British accent and that's appealling to lots of Australian girls" I apologised (even though I was sure it's not my fault), to avoid another kick in the shin and she said "Don't be silly! I know you're not going to run off with them, I just didn't know if you'd noticed"

Now that's odd behaviour to me! I'm used to girls at home being jealous and possesive in that sort of situation. But anyway, they came back and asked to borrow lighter again. I gave it, and after lighting a cig from a new pack of 20 the girl said "We don't normally smoke, we only smoke when we drink on friday nights. I shouldn't have even bought this pack. Tell me when you're about to leave and you can have them" I nodded politely, thought 'bloody drunks!' and guessed that was the end of it.

Then TT (please don't think badly of her for this, she's usually such a quiet girl) whispers to me "She's probably stuck them up her vagina so you can get a taste" I was completely and utterly shocked! She's never sworn, and although I know that's not swearing, it's very blunt! She's just never like that!

I almost fell off my stool laughing. I think I must be bad company for her because I've not been here that long and it's exactly the sort of thing I'd say.

We got up to leave shortly afterwards and the girl came running after us and reached us just as we touched the door. She offers me her virtually full packet of cigarettes. "Don't be so silly" I told her. "But my boyfriend will kill me if he finds them in my bag. And I don't want to give them to a bum" she protests. I shoot a glance at TT and say to the girl "My girlfriend is a little worried. Are you sure you've not put them...." TT goes wide-eyed and instantly interupts "Thank you! That's really kind of you! Would you like a beer or something for them?"

I wouldn't really have said it of course, I just wanted TT to panic because I'm mean like that! We left the pub with an almost full pack of cigs and, bonus, (well, depends how you look at these things), they didn't seem to be vagina flavoured at all....

On Saturday morning we went into the Valley. It's a very trendy area of the city - although we live one suburb over because it's trendiest and you know that matters to TT and I(!) It's also Chinatown area, and where I bought my wok/pestle & mortar on thursday for only "Firty sefen dorrars" Bargain eh?

After that we went into the city centre, bummed around a bit then went to a pub in preparation to meet TT's friends when they finished work.

The pub we chose turned out to be a sports bar and although neither of us are into huge widescreen sports entertainment we enjoyed the avo. They were showing all sorts of crap ranging from "normal" sports like 6 nations rugby (yey!) to Hurley (not sure of spelling), a very violent Irish sport that's a cross between all known "normal" sports with a side-serving of added violence.

We had fun. And when her friends turned up it was even funner. Yes. Funner. I speak English good, me. Drank way too much beer and don't remember much of the latter part of the evening.

I was really ill this morning. I woke up feeling very sheepish which is always a bad way to start the day. I knew I'd done nothing that bad, but also had that weird guilty feeling which always seems to accompany nights where I can't remember the ending. TT and I made love which meant I couldn't have done anything that bad, then she said "Don't forget when you put your pants on (Trousers for any UK readers) the money pocket is the one on the left". I said "Eh? You what?" and she told me that I embarrassed her hugely last night by saying loudly in the pub "You know where the money is don't you?!"

I half-remember saying it, but I only meant it as a joke. I'd give my life for this girl, money is nothing. How can I make her understand that? I've felt rotten all day because I embarrassed her. She never asks for anything but I want to give her everything. I'm bad.

We went out this afternoon and done some grocery shopping and she wouldn't let me pay. I always pay. I want to pay. We went to videostore and got out two top titles. I was waiting with cash but she wouldn't let me pay. All this guilt over a silly comment. How do I make it up to her? She's not being bitchy, I think she feels bad that I pay for stuff and mentioned it. How do I convince her that I only said it as a joke? It really was.

I'm going to go to bed in a moment, but before I do, just a couple of other really brief things:

VUBOQ - I think you're the reason TT will be reading this now. She came over to me earlier as I was reading your website and saw the "Leave a comment" window open. She didn't say anything, but she's not silly, she'll most likely check it tomorrow, hence my rumbledness. At least she'll get to see your "Hope TT feels better soon" type comment!

Stat Counter - Again, while talking randomly to TT early she told me her blog had about 60 regular readers. That's a lot isn't it? Or am I just really crap? That's regular, returning visitors, not just page loads. Bah.

Other stat counter - I checked the web-stats of the company I founded and directed for the last four years. The website for that company is getting over 5000 hits a day. Holy Shit! Er, why did I leave?! Fuck it, regret is a wasted emotion. I'm a firm believer in that, and strangely enough, even with those stats, I've not felt any regret and I'm sure I wont.

Rude words - I got an email from someone in the aforementioned company earlier, and they were asking for some personal information. TT read it with me and said "Why would they want you to tell them that?" Which was a really valid question. I immediately replied "Because he's a c@#t" and then went really red. I NEVER use that word, I hate it. I'm really shocked that I came out with it so casually and instantly. I guess I'm "Mr Blurt-it-out" at the moment.

Hope you've all had good weekend. TT wants to start a diet tomorrow, although she's got NO reason to. I guess it'll mean giving up chocs as that's the only thing she has which is vaguely unhealthy. I'm planning to show my support by exercising lots. Gods know I need to.