Triple take

Random ramblings of a British guy that's moved to Australia. And now back to UK.

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

I have emotions. Perhaps I'm human after all...

The only thing that's been slightly bothering me about moving to Australia is the fact that I'm looking forward to it so much. I'm extremely lucky to be part of a very close family. We all live close by, apart from an uncle in South Africa, but even he visits five or six times a year. We're always there for one another. And yet here's me, the black sheep, actually looking forward to moving 10000 miles away.

And my friends - I have lots of friends here that would do anything for me. And yet I've been looking forward to moving without really worrying. My own coldness and nonchalance was really concerning me, I felt an arsehole for not caring about leaving everything here.

That all changed yesterday. After my brief post I went and saw LB. I don't know why it happened but I stood in her house and looked around me, the photos on her mantelpiece, the fish tank in the corner, the pool table in the dining room. Things I've seen a thousand times, and I just broke down.

I started crying like a baby.

She looked at me, walked over in silence, and gave me a huge hug. Then she started crying too.

This morning I met my mother in town and went shopping with her. She wanted to buy TT something for her birthday. My sister works during the day and as it's school holidays over here at the moment mum had my 7 year old niece with her. I suddenly realised that I'm going to miss her growing up.

We went to a cafe and while mum was queuing I took a seat with my niece. She doesn't know that I'm going to Australia yet but she just looked at me and said "I love you Uncle X". Oh shit. I don't know how I managed to control tears again. Twice in 24 hours. Emotions 2, Self control 0.

I know none of you read this, but I still want to say I love you all - My family, my friends, and especially you niece, K. I can't write any more, Emotions have just made it 3 nil...

Sorry

7 Comments:

Blogger vuboq said...

aw. that's so sweet.
i don't even know you and i'm getting all teary.
*sniff*

12:34 am  
Blogger Only me said...

Don't start me off again VUBOQ....!

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