Barclays bank are shit

I promised at some point last week that I'd tell you about the "Barclays Bank Being Wankers/Shit/Crap" story. I may not have phrased it quite that way but let's not beat around the bush...

Rather than tell you about the problem blow by blow, here's a conversation I had with them:

AT BARCLAYS BRANCH, FEB 2006

Scowling, Loud, Unhelpful Teller: "NEXT! What's the problem?"

me: "er, [bit shocked] Hi! I've got an issue I'd like to discuss. It may be more appropriate to discuss it in a private room?"

ST: "We dont have one available. What's the problem?"

me: "ok, I was overseas recently, I tried to withdraw cash and the machine said my card had been reported stolen and swallowed it-"

ST:[interrupting me] "So you need a new card? Account number?"

me: "er, no, please allow me to continue... I called the UK from my mobile and asked my mother to try and sort it for me. After her making numerous calls, and then me making several, from
Australia, you still refused to help in any way"

ST: "Let me look....Hmm, account overdrawn, that's why it happened...."

me: "EH?! WHAT? Overdrawn?! Since bloody when?! It should have loads in!"

ST: "Well, it's not come up on my computer yet, but that's the usual reason"

me: "Not in this bloody case! My account is NOT overdrawn!"

ST: "Oh, no, you're right, it's fine. The machine in Australia must have been faulty, simple as that. I'll get a new card sent. Bye."

Nice eh?

I was away the next few days but when I got back I had a pile of mail from various companies telling me Barclays had refused direct debits etc. I went back to the branch. I got to speak to the same Scowly Teller:

ST: "Yes? Problem?"

me: " Hi! Remember me? My card got swallowed and you ordered me a new one after assuring me there wasn't a problem with my account...?"

ST: "Hmm. Yes. Well?"

me: [produces pile of letters from offended companies being declined payment by Barclays]

ST: "Hmm. Insurance mandate....Hmmm....Yes, you told us to cancel that on x of Feb..."

me: "EH?! I was in bloody Australia then! You know that, we had a big argument about it yesterday!"

ST: "Well, there's nothing wrong with account, I'll reactivate the direct debits. Bye."

A couple of days later I try and use my card and it gets swallowed as stolen. Then I get more letters saying direct debits had been refused. And so it continued.

I gave up with sulky teller and got promoted to manager attention. Even he couldn't see a problem with my account. The computer will let them reactivate the account but the moment i try and use it the security thing kicks in and tells them the account is on hold.

I've had 7 visits to my local branch and 2 to the nearest city branch. Uncountable phone calls, immeasurable embarrassment as payments have been refused, etc. But I've finally got a meeting with the regional manager on Monday. Yey! I'm going to metaphorically wipe the floor with his sorry arse....

Hope you've had a good day?! As you can tell, mine pretty dull, hence ranting....

Missing tt lots