Overheard gems

Yeah, apologies for not posting and all that bollocks. Believe me, work is in progress and the situation will improve. (Well, improve if you like reading my drivel, situation will become shitter if you hate me and come here to read in the same way you look at a car wreck)

Anyhoo, today I took the bus home from work. The two loud guys behind me were having a conversation:

Idiot 1: "It'd be really easy to stop these traffic jams"
Idiot 2: "Really? How?"
1: "Well, look at the gateway motorway over there. Most of it is filled with cars."
2: "Yeah, and?"
1: "Well, imagine how many more people you could get along the motorway if we filled those big articulated trucks with seats in the back?"
2: "Wow! That would really cut down the number of cars!"

Er.....

Is is just me or is a large vehicle filled with seats called a bus? The very thing they were sat on? Oh jeez. I refrained from turning around and exploding. Then they started the next conversation:

2: "You got anyting planned for the holiday weekend?"
1: "Gotta knock down me shed. I love me shed"
2: "Why you knocking it down then?"
1: "It's made of asbestos so I've got to smash it down so they can build a wooden one on Tuesday"
2: "Will it take all weekend?"
1: "No, that shit shatters really easy. I'll just bash it and it'll take longer to sweep up the pieces than the taking down"

Gods help us.