My Dearest....
...Neighbour,
I've asked you repeatedly not to take my bin out to the street for me on bin day. I can manage it myself.
Particularly hateworthy is that you do it on the day before bin day which. Unsuprisingly, this the day I choose to empty my household bins into the outside collectable bin. Except I can't easily because you've moved the fucking thing onto the street.
Due to your "assistance" I now have to go out every Tuesday, collect my bin from where you've left it and bring it nearer the house in order that I may use it.
Seriously, I have begged and pleaded for you to leave it alone and you just cheerily smile and wander away with it. I've since discovered you're deaf. Normally I'd feel a pang of guilt but no. You know exactly what I'm saying, you're playing with your disability.
Don't deny it, you're reading this. You read the letter attached to aforementioned bin that ranged from the initial polite to the final "FUCK OFF AND LEAVE THIS BIN HERE" Complete with my house number and phone number but you never came to explain your actions.
Today you've taken my bin for the final time. Next week it will be booby trapped. You have had your final warning. Sweet dreams cunt.
J x
posted by Only me @ 10:23 PM
2 Comments:
Haha, my neighbours do this too. Mainly because i always forget which day is bin day, and they have little wish to live amongst 3 year old piles of my household waste. I suspect they will be booby-trapping the bin for me sometime soon...
Also, i am thinking of charging you for this blatant plagarism of my favourite blog layout. I think about a thousand should do it.
Another way of making your neighbour stop could be, when you have to take your bin back to your house, you deliver his bin back to his. Of course, you'll take yours back to the roadside again.
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